Inspiration

Lately, I found myself so inspired. I've always looked at things in life a little differently, but lately I just feel a little lighter, a little more open, not taking life so serious. Objects are drawing me in as well are people. I'm seeing beauty like never before. Shadows have personalities, rocks have attitudes, the shape of vegetables are sensuous, opposite textures compliment, and the world is becoming a diiferent place for me to see.

I feel alive.

Nude Lawn Mower Guy

Chopping vegetables this last weekend, I glanced out the kitchen window and this is what I see.

He did it for my reaction and he got the double take he was looking for. I love that he did this.

Underestimated

Yes, this is me blonde.

Anyways, this is me painting around the crawl space at my house.

I do lots of things people don't think I'm able.

I know more about the guts of a home and it's yard than the average person would care to.

People assume that, one because I'm a girl that I wouldn't have a clue.

And two I'm a girl in a wheelchair. (she needs to be in a corner knitting)!

This shouldn't be something that I should really be proud of, but I am.

I've sledged hammered the lath and plaster out of my kitchen. (the walls).

I've stained and cut wood with power saws, drilled holes.

I've work in the yard, pulling, digging, moving earth, laying sod, and planting.

I help with drywall, plumbing, and electrical.

I scraped tar off our floors and acoustic off the ceilings,sanded and painted.

All the while I designed, planned, and scheduled, and did a lot of clean up.

The designing and planning are of course my favorite parts.

But In order to make it nice there is a lot of labor involved.

Yeah I did need help getting up off the ground or help lifting heavy things, etc.

And yes the majority was done by my husband.

Yet still to this day, even people who we've showed and told of what we've done, say what a great job

that my husband did and always say that I picked out really good colors.

Even the people that saw us sweating our asses off, put me only in the color category.

Like I said in the beginning, people assume.

I love it when someone will ask my husband a construction type question,

I'll answer it, and they look at me like I don't know what I'm talking about.

They look at him like okay what do I really need to do,

and he'll say... she just told you.

Stepping Stones.

I'm in the final stage of finishing up my dachshund painting. Whew! It has been a long haul. I have also used that as final stepping stone to move on to different kinds of subject matter. The process of coming up with ideas and composition straight from the old brain. This is exciting and fun because this is something I'm doing for myself. Who knows if it will fully work, but it's totally worth the try.

Having art in my life is so important and I'm learning that more and more. It doesn't really matter what form it comes in, because it makes me think and feel. What's not good about that?

Mind Games

My mind is in a fantasy world of so many ideas and yearnings. My mind likes to play with me, it gives me false hope and wanders down paths I can't control. Maybe it knows me too well, maybe it wants me to experience, maybe it wants me to fail. I fight everyday to be more and to allow myself the privilege of being me.

My intentions starting this blog were to get out some feelings and to share some of my experiences in a wheelchair. It has made quite the turn into my sexual quirkiness and to the exhibitionistic side of me. I for now am just going with it, because frankly this is me and is the person most people don't see. 

Actually the whole position thing is just for fun because, I never have sex in my chair. It's more of a challenge and something to have fun with.

Petals

I feel relaxed and at peace with myself today.

Smooooooth.

There's something about having my pussy waxed that turns me on. It's not the actual process, but the feeling afterward. I think it's the pain that tingles from within, the smoothness of the lips and the sensitivity it brings. I have this done periodically and wonder why each time, why don't I do this more. Yesterday I treated myself to this bit of torture and have been horny since. Last night had to resist sex because I was so raw, but I was so horny. This morning I enjoyed myself in the shower, and can't wait for my hubby to get home.

I was wondering how many of us wax and if so, does it have the same effect?

Inside me

There are moments in my life that I feel like I'm floating by. I grasp at anything and ignore somethings, feeling it is self preservation. I feel like this is my life and I want to live it, but feel as if I'm some how road blocked by others. Also realizing I do it to myself. They are a part of my life because of default, but not because they fill my soul. In reality I don't know fully what fills my soul, but I pretty much have an idea what doesn't. Times like this, I feel that I want to scream, I want to fuck, I want to eat, I want to leave. But I don't.......I suppress. Then I feel no movement, life is still. I don't know how to use my words, to benefit what is important to me. If I talk about anything out of the norm, it seems to cause conflict, shock, hurt feelings, or the tendency to clam up. Those honestly are not my intentions I seek. I feel sometimes I'm to real. 

We're in for one hell of a ride.

Ok, this just crossed my mind and I'm going to go with it. Have you seen the T-shirts or posters with different people or animals in the many different sexual positions?

Well I think I need to start a series of how many positions you can get into a wheelchair. Yes I've done a few sexual things from my chair but it's not my normal place of choice. I just thought it would be a kick to see what we could do with this. Also, my husband loves the idea. Why Not??

We will be uploading pictures in the near future.

Take a picture, it lasts longer.

Being stared at is how one takes it.  Some days, I feel pretty good about myself and it doesn't bother me. Why some days are different then others is beyond me? Today I felt like a giant rolling turd that should have gotten up and did a tap dance for the people who just need some kind of freak show-train wreck.

I know I shouldn't let people get to me, but they do, and they will, and I'll deal with it. 

Yea, I look at persons that look different than myself, but I don't stare. It's just rude.