Going no where fast

I'm not supposed to be home, but I am. Because of the 1960's elevator at my school is broken for the umpteenth time. I was geared up to go to class and guess what? My class is on the second floor. So gearing up and lugging my paint supplies and canvas in and out of my car in a mere circus feat did not pan out today.

So let's blog.

This weekend we went out to dinner  and drinks with some high school friends who lead a pretty bland life but once in a while good to see them. They asked us over for jacuzzi after and we went. Upon arriving wearing my suit and a little cover up. I rolled over to the deck and needed to pop up my front wheels to get up one step on a deck and thought hubby was behind me to push me up (poor judgement on my part) and he wasn't and I flipped myself back in my chair. I china bowled my head, screwed up my back and bruised the heck out of my elbows and ego. After laying there a minute and regaining the fact of " what the hell just happened" Hubby got me up and we got in the Jacuzzi. I finished the eve a little sore and glad I went straight to the jacuzzi because it probably relaxed some stuff.  I did pay for it the next couple days. I went to chiropractor this morning and already feel better.

On a funnier note, Saturday we went to the Improv and saw Mitch Fatel, one of our favorite comedians. It was at an Improv not so close to our house. Not sure if you're aware but Mitch Fatel is open about being a swinger. So we knew there could be great possibility that the show could bring in that kind of crowd. That isn't the reason we chose to go, but it just came as kind of a side dish (LOL). We were standing out front waiting to get in before the show and scoping the crowd and we kept trying to see if we could pick out lifestyle people. There is a certain look, believe it or not. We are not always correct, but many times we are. This cute black guy smiled at me from across the way and I returned the smile back and then he came towards us. He says, you don't remember me do you? He looked familiar and then he mentioned one of the recent meet and greet places we went and instantly we remembered. I thought he was cute then and we had talked to him and his girlfriend for quite a while.
Hubby wasn't really attracted to the girlfriend at the time and neither was I. Beside the point...Anyways.
Funny part is, obviously he's in the lifestyle but he wasn't there for the show. He happened to be the manager of the place and just had recognized us. We're kinda hard to forget. Tall blond dude and redhead in a wheelchair.  He got us in first and sat us in awesome 2nd row seats and made sure we were taken care of. I gave him my art business card and told him if he was ever in our town to give us a ring. The show was great, we picked out a few people that we honed in on as swingers and just had fun. Towards the end in between acts they played the song "I'm sexy and I know it" as a buffer. As soon as it went quiet "manager guy" leaned over a little pony wall next to wear I sat leaned over to me and whispered in my ear, "you're sexy and you know it". It made me giggle a bit and of course blush. He winked. It made me feel good. I told hubby what he said and he just smiled.

We drove home late night and ended up going to a local restaurant bar in our little downtown area. They do karaoke on Saturday nights, we however don't sing but laugh and watch. We met up with a friend who was also ending his evening there and we shut the place down at 2am.

My husband was looking fine all night. My mind was filled all nught with wanting to jump his bones and we did just that when we got home.

Rolling in heels

Just a couple years or so ago I decided that I'm going to wear high heels. I've never been able to wear them because I can't walk in them. When I figured out...why the hell not, I'm sitting 98% of the time?? I'm going to give it a try.

My criteria for high heels is the heel can't be super spikey because they will fall through the foot plate of my wheelchair. Also they can't have a strap because they have to be easy to just slip off quickly in case I need to stand at a moments notice. Another requirement is that they can't have too much of a slope (or too high) because my toes have been fused and can't bend very much.

All that said, here is the issue I ran into this weekend. I had to be a little innovative/ crazy (which comes pretty easy for me) Most people wouldn't go this far for vanity, but I guess I would.
Being at weddings and receptions in casinos for many hours at a time this past weekend made my camel like abilities nearly impossible.

I had to come up with something because guess what? You have to stand up to sit down to potty. In order for me to stand up I have to take my shoes (high heels) off. Okay, I'm not walking or standing on the floor of a public restroom in my bare feet. EEEEwwww.

So I came up with two things. The first being a washcloth I took from the hotel and a paper placemat from a restaurant placesetting. I could use them to put on the ground in front of me to step on and them I could take my shoes off in front of the toilet.
I guess we could call this survival of the fittest or just down right cheesy, but sometimes you do what you gotta do.

Why am I writing about my bathroom issues. Well it's not just bathroom issues, it's the battle of being as feminine as I can. It doesn't come easy as it sometimes appears. I just want people to know we all have things that we must adjust, to get out of life what we want. Even if it is as stupid as putting a piece of paper on a bathroom floor to stand on.

Age old question

For the last couple years I've been joking that I want to get a chicken costume and go to a costume party as a Chicken in a Wheelchair. I don't want to spend the money on a costume and really not that big into costume parties. This year hubby piped in an said he wants to be an egg and roll in my old wheelchair. Then we would be the age old question , "What came first , the chicken or the egg?" It would be fun fighting to get through doorways to see which one came first. Also we could have little ballot boxes attached to us for people to vote who came first. Then at the end of the evening the person with the most votes would settle that decision.

The pictures above are what I came up with when I type chicken in a wheelchair to Google images.

What's in a name?

Laroo Fondue

In my next life I want to be a stripper.

No, I really do.

If anybody knows of someone who could help teach me pole dancing from the wheelchair, I'd love it.

Suck it up, and put on your big girl panites.

We've been wanting to go on a vacation, as I've talked about in previous posts. Mexico was top on our list this summer, but we waited too long and now it's hurricane season and don't want to risk it ruining our vacation. We are going to put it of until next May. The weather is suppose to be great that time of year. I think we've resolved ourselves to little weekend getaways here and there.

Vegas kicked it off a couple weekends ago, and now we've booked a little nude resort in the dessert. We researched and felt pretty good about it. This would be our first time to go to one, and just want to experience it. This place is also a "lifestyle" friendly resort, which is okay with us, we know our boundaries and heard that others are respectful of yours.

Now here's where my insecurities come in. Hubby calls to make the reservation, asks about the availability, gives our info, then asks if we could have a downstairs room because his wife is in a wheelchair. First thing out of the ladies mouth is, "You do realize this is a "lifestyle" friendly resort? Hubby says, "yep". Then they proceed with credit card numbers. He said he could tell by her voice that the wheelchair issue threw her off.

So, one part of my mind says, "fuck them" I'm going to go enjoy myself just like everyone else. The other part says, people in wheelchairs don't go to places like this. You're not going to be treated the same and they don't want your kind there. They don't want to be uncomfortable and I might make them feel that way.

I feel very teary eyed right now and need to snap out of it. I will muster up the courage, because that's me.

Vanilla with Sprinkles

It's weird, I worry about my body image, but at the same time it bothers me to think I'm too vanilla. I don't want to be what people expect. I want to live pushing the envelope a bit. I want to be empowered and be a sexual being. I hope I can create some kind of new attitude towards different body types, be it standing or sitting. (starting with myself)

I work hard to be in the best shape I can. I eat well, exercise, take way to much time doing my hair and make up, laugh and love a lot. At the end of the day I will never have the body that I have in my mind. I play up my attributes and play down some major flaws. Unfortunately, in my mind I think I look better than I do . When I look in the mirror or pictures, I can't believe what has happened to my body. How it has failed me or how I fail it. Then on the complete flip side, I like to show my body. Somehow those roles don't play out well. Security and insecurity wrapped in one. How do I deal with that?

Oh No, You Didn't!

The other day some friends, myself and hubby ate at our favorite dive Mexican restaurant. After finishing a yummy dinner we proceeded to leave single file out of the packed establishment. Our little line parade consisted of friend, me, friend and hubby. Friend in front of me had to stop to let people cross in front, in which made us all stop. All was clear and we started to move, but not me.I couldn't make my chair roll, I immediately looked back at my friend behind me thinking she was messing with me. All within a couple seconds realize a man sitting at the table that I'm passing is holding onto my wheel. I look at him like....do I know you? He smirks with a bit of a wink and I just stared. Like what the hell are you doing? He lets go. I shake my head and roll away. His friend proceeds to say (not knowing my husband is 2 people behind me)"your sense of humor obviously went over that young ladys head". Hubby puts a heavy hand on the guys shoulder, puts his face in his and says, "Oh she gets it, she just sick of dealing with dumb asses like you." Then walks off.

These particular friends were beside themselves because they have not encountered this with me before. I can honestly say that this type of thing is said or done to me at least once a day. It's not usually physical, but verbal. I equate this incident to me grabbing your belt loop or the back of your shirt and stopping you in your tracks. It's weird coming from a complete stranger. I am totally ok with people I know touching me, leaning on me, etc. I have personal space like anybody, it just covers a little more space.

These people who are grabbing, leaning, rolling me, saying "let's race", "you're to pretty to be in a chair," "what's wrong with you", "my mom was in a wheelchair for a year, I know what you're going through", "I'm tired of walking, you're lucky you don't have to walk." they think they are being funny or trying to break the ice. I know most of them are harmless and for some reason they are compelled to have to say something to the handicapped girl, because it will make themselves feel better. Not realizing that I have heard it 50 million times and I am just going about my everyday life just like the rest of us. Sometimes it's easy to smile and just keep going and let it roll off. (no pun intended, funny though) Other times, not so much!!!

Butt White

So, I'm butt white. 

I wear sunscreen off and on and then burn and peel. It takes some doing to get myself a nice looking tan. In the years past I hate to admit, but have been a part time booth burner. It had seemed to be the easiest way to gradually work into my summer tan without going through the burning or covering up with sunscreen and not getting any color. It was just laying in a tanning bed for 15-20 minutes for a few sessions and wahhh-la... I was off white. Well, I know better than to do this whole UV skin cancer thing and I'm trying to lean towards a healthier alternative.

So, I've decided to try Mystic Tan. You stand in a booth and you are sprayed for about 30 seconds and your done.

Well, easier said than done.

I checked this whole arrangement out before I chose to go ahead and do this. It seemed that I would physically be able to do this and for such a short amount of time it wouldn't be bad. I even got out of my chair and got in the booth to see how it would be. I was able to hold the walls for balance and it all seemed pretty good. So I made an appointment and came back a couple days later.

I took my mom with me, just for support the first time. So, I do all the preparing you do before you get in. Barrier cream between the toes and fingers and bellybutton, oh and yes you go naked. Barrier cream keeps areas from getting to dark. Then in I go. I pushed a button towards the front of the booth to start it  and then step back on the designated foot plate and position my body. Well, because of my jack rabbit quickness and keen sense of balance, the damn thing nearly knocked my ass over. Oh and by the way, you are supposed to keep your eyes closed and your mouth shut. As I'm being pummeled by the three air compressor type nozzles and almost doing a nose dive, I catch myself and hold on for dear life and realize my legs are together and my eyes and mouth are wide open. The machine stops and I turn around for my back to get the treatment. I hold on with all my might, and here we go again. I get pushed against the back wall and I stand there trembling and shaking. When it's done I throw open the door with this fog like haze rolling out of the door and look at my mom and say "I almost died"!! We just laughed. But I was bummed because I bought a package deal and didn't know if I could do this 3 more times. For most people it would be nothing, but a feather could knock me over, so this was going to be a challenge. Damn it! I don't want skin cancer, but here I am now sucking up Mystic Tan spray and who knows what that's doing to me. Will I be able to catch myself the next time the hurricane force winds blow? Well we don't know right now, but did go to Walmart and purchased a grab bar with suction cups on it to stick on the wall of the spray booth.

As of now, the tan is mediocre at best. I'm told you need to keep going to build the tan up. Yes, I am a glutton for punishment.

(No,the picture above is not me.)( I wish I had her body) :)

All is Good.

This has been a big month for this chick. Although I have the urge to blog, getting the notion to do it is another thing. I always seem to be busy doing other things or just don't know what to write. I don't want to quit and I won't. I guess it's just a little lull. 

Anyways, We had a great opening at our gallery on May 9th. We had 89 pieces total and sold 22 so far. I think we hit our market for the time being. With them being only 2 or 3 inches, they were a bit more affordable. Because right now with the bad economy NO ONE is buying art. And that's understandable. I continue working on the itty bitties to fill holes where the others have sold. This show is up till about the middle of June.

Also, I will be entering the OC fair with one of my pieces. The fair is a good way to get your name out there. In the past, I've entered myself into the amateur division of the fine arts. This will be the first year to enter the professional division. I'm required to do that because I am selling on a regular basis. I guess that's where I am and I'm pretty ok with that. It's a good advertising gig with thousands of people viewing your work for a month... for like a 15 buck entry fee. That's so worth it to me.

Something that is pretty cool that happened the other day is......I got a new chair!! Yeahhhh!! I ordered it a month and a half ago, and it finally is complete. It's custom made, so it takes a while.

It's been almost 6 years since I've gotten a new one. It's like getting a new car and wardrobe all in one. It's very nice and I have become one with it quite quickly. My other one was getting pretty worn down and uncomfortable. I guess that's what happens when you sit, roll, do home improvement, paint, yard work, dance, go to school, vacation..........and just live. We got a killer deal that I will explain on another post when I unveil the ass attachment. 

I will try to be a better blogger.

A salute to a captain

Roll with me

So the other day I cracked my frame of my wheelchair. Thank goodness the company that makes my chair has a lifetime warranty on their frames. They are located fairly close to us, so we were able to take it there for a quick weld. They are making me a new frame to replace this one also. I've had this particular one for about 5 years and am due for a new one anyways. I'm going ahead with letting them replace my present chair, but will be ordering a brand new one soon. The one I have now is a Colours Spazz and the new chair will be a Colours Razorblade. They are great chairs and just love their way of thinking and being. If you check it out at Colours you will understand what I mean. Also they have one of the most insane tricks done in a wheelchair you've ever seen. These chairs are not cheap, but I look at it this way...I have spent everyday for the last 5 years in this chair. It has taken me so many miles and different places that I could never had gone with me hobbling along, it is so worth every dime. Actually, last couple times Muscular Dystrophy has bought me my chair. Yes, Jerry Lewis does really does help kids and adults with MD. And yes, I am a Jerry's kid. :) Wonder how many of them have done an ISM? :)

I'm out there somewhere.

I'm trying to find myself and I know I'm out there somewhere. Been through more than most in life, but not as much as some. I'm happy to be here but don't really know why or what I'm doing here.

Life has been passing me by like a train and I'm trying to grab on and I keep loosing grip.

I have passions, but surpress them even though I really don't want to. I feel like I have to catch up, and need to leave behind the useless shit and suck up the important things.

I had all kinds of physical issues at an early age and didn't know how to embrace them, so I got mad and leary about life. Even after marriage I've encountered some life altering moments that there just haven't been easy to deal with. I'm now in a wheelchair faced with making the best out of my life. Believe it or not, I've been succesful in certain aspects, and feel pretty proud about my accomplishments. Don't get me wrong, it's beaten me down lower than you can imagine but that has made me want to be so much more of an individual.

So, in this blog is where I've chosen to vent and share and hopefully.... find me.