Sunday, April 18, 2010

My next post I will put on a happy face or be nude.

Bleh, bleh, bleh.
Oh, bleh.
Bleh.......bleh, bleh bleh bleh bleh.

Believe me, it's better than the pity party I had written earlier.

Bleh bleh di di bleh moo moo.
Ta dah Laroo!

Interpets to, I'm a bad sister. She's leaving on a 2 week vacation and I avoided going to help her get ready to go and send her off with warm fuzzies. She's all alone and I can't sit with her and her actions anymore. She has phyical issues like me and I know how alone I would feel in her situation. I know she feels alone I can here it in her voice. Our once seemingly close relationship died with my brother-in-law. Now I'm going to wallow in my guilt and weak behaviors and let them eat me alive until I can get a grip.

Bleh.

I still ended up writing about it.
bleh.
Life is throwing some fast balls. fuck.

Bleh, because that's the feel.

10 comments:

Sulpicia said...

Well... Don't eat all of you up alive. Save a bit for painting, and loving, and eating, and blogging!

Sometimes you have to take care of yourself first and fuck the guilt. (Excuse the language.)

XS

Gray said...

*hugs* Sometimes we have to step back to understand things better or just breathe.

Bob said...

Bob is looking for an unhappy face and a nude Laroo ....

Apart from this Monday wish, I'm thinking that your sister is a big girl and WTF, who needs help going on vacation anyway?! Pack the bags, go! Don't feel bad. Sis should feel bad for leaving you behind and not taking her sister on vacation.

(Naked) Hugs....:) Just smile. Be happy, Laroo.

La Roo said...

Sulpicia- I'm to tough to be eaten up. :) I have these weak moments that just seem all so consuming though. You can cus all you want. :)

Gray- I'm trying to get a grip on these intense feelings. Thanks for the hug. Today seems better.

Bob-uh kind of glad she didn't ask me to go with her. :) No really there's part of her that just seems fragile, but I just can't muster the willingness to be there for her.
:( (*) (*) sad face and boobies.
I will be ok.

Bob said...

Waiting......:)

C said...

yes i agree you must take care of yourself above all else... wha happened with the BIL?

hugs,

c

Crash said...

blehs real - why can't ya be bleh sometimes? why is it that we feel the need to be all - YAY lifes a great big warm pile of snuggly things? -

life has some serious sharp edges, at least mine does - it's okay to share them right?

Well it is with me - I appreciate it when people expose themselves a little [there's a joke in there somewhere - I'm sure of it ...]

Hugs Roo ... Crash.

justme said...

Her problems are not yours. If you make them yours, it will only make you miserable.

La Roo said...

Bob-tap tap tap of the finger. huh?

C- I'm trying to make sense of it all and take care of myself and cope better with the guilt. Thanks.
BIL....? Are you talking about the fish?

Crash-I was allowing some blehs, that's why I was writing it here. My big thing is that the blehs scare me if they stay around more than a couple days. I just really hate being around "Debbie Downers" and dont want to be one myself.
(i like to expose myself and let myself free) in more ways than one. :) Thanks Crash.

Justme-You are absolutely right. I couldn't agree more........now let my brain and heart know that. :)

Bob said...

Promises, promises....:)

Still waiting, Laroo.....