I can't be alone for 2 minutes.

Sometimes when things are quiet and I have a half a moment to look at my life... it scares me. The not knowing why I'm here. The wondering what I would've been under other circumstances. Wondering if I've settled too much or deleted things that I enjoy too much. What's with the wheelchair, because in reality I think that whole thing was some sick joke. I pull it off way to well to be a handicapped person. Should I have had kids? Will I regret not having any? Should I get a tattoo? I want to volunteer doing something but don't want to put the effort into researching it. But know if I found the right cause, I would put my whole self into it. How can I be a better wife? Lover? Friend? Will I ever be the artist I want to be? 

Oh geez, enough!