Tuesday, July 12, 2011

It's not easy being green. (oh, I mean...me)

I'm trying to put myself in a better place. 
I've been selfish, I've put myself in protection mode.
I can't ignore no more.
I went on a mental vacation.
Time is limited.
I'm afraid not to do something or not be there.
My dreams torture me.
How can one part of your life be doing so good while another is on a slow crumble?
I'm preparing myself as only I can do.
I cry , because it's who I am and what I feel.
I'm worrying about what can't be planned.
I just know how much I will miss her.
It hurts already.


willadean said...

big hugs to you. hope everything your dealing with calms down and you are ok

La Roo said...

Willa- Thanks girl. My mom and I have a bond that is one of the best things in my life. She had me later in life and we are bestest of friends. She has been one of those people that has been strong and a real go getter and in the past several months I've been watching her slowing down. She's taking naps, not wanting to do things as much, really hasn't much to say or talk about. Her birthday is tomorrow...she turns 84. It scares the shit out of me. I've been so fortunate she has been so strong and stayed so young for all these years. Her body is just tired now and it's so scary to watch.
Oh my gawd, TMI, huh? Sorry.

Bob said...

Your hard drive needs scrubbing and a new program installed that's titled Laroo 5.0. That old 2.0 program ain't cutting it, girl. It's ripping you up.

willadean said...

i'm so sorry for what you are going thru with you mom. how wonderful that you've had a life full of good times and love with her, there are many people who do not know anything like that. take care xxoo