Thursday, August 27, 2009

Trip Talk

On the way home from our weekend trip we talked about the different things that we had just encountered at the nude resort. It was so very interesting how people broke down into clicks. Not really in a bad way (not like high school), but I could see where everyone after being there for just a short time fell into a niche. There were the hardcore swingers, the soft swappers, the single ladies, the nudists, voyeurs and the exhibitionists. Then there were a handful of us that really didn't know where we fit in, but we were a part of this whole dynamic.
In our relationship it is new that we are talking to each other about the attraction to others. I don't think hubby realized that he isn't the only one looking at a pretty girl walking by. I think both sexes can be attractive and some more than others and not just always in a physical way.
We discussed whom we found to be nice or sexy or just sleazy. Also we talked about who we were attracted to, guy or girl. There were people we befriended, but not necessarily attracted to. Then there were others we did hang out with that we did find a certain comfort level/ attraction. It was actually kind of refreshing to me that we could put that out there with out a jealousy factor coming into play. It's just such a wonderment to me how some people are super nice and you would want them as a friend and others are as equal but there is an interaction that turns into an attraction. Does that make sense?


Gray said...

I am so glad you two had a good time. And that you can openly communicate about things with out the jealousy factor. Makes life so much easier!

The world according to Gaz said...

Jealousy is a curse that can ruin the best of relationships. It would be easy for that to take over but it seems like the communication between the two of you is open and such things won't cause any problems.

Bob said...

There will be, whether high school or if you're 30, 40 or whatever, people like this. They're insecure which is why they (a) run in packs in order to (b) gain approval. Check out the cliques at your next high school reunion. . . they're still alive and kicking after all those years. That sucks.

As for jealousy, don't you think it arises out of being hurt by the action of another? Or by feeling insecure in a relationship.

La Roo said...

Gray- it does make things much easier if you can communicate. It has been a process in getting there in our marriage though. I feel very proud of us for being able to do this.

Gaz- we have a strong relationship, but we are still learning. We are trying to beat the insecurities of our past.

Bob-actually I was ok with the way it broke down into clicks in this particular situation. Reason being, I didn't feel the pressure of swapping partners, because everyone else was. This way there were some of us that were just along for the ride.
I know what you're saying though. I don't do class reunions, they do nothing for me. Probably because of what you explained.
I do think jealousy arises out of being hurt and being insecure. I think they go hand in hand. Both of us have issues that I think we are coming to grips with, therefore making communication and trust a little easier.

Bob said...

I'm taking applications for dock girl. It pays very well. Fringe benefits up the wazoo (literally). Car is furnished with credit card. 3 squares. Great retirement plan.

Would you like to apply? Or perhaps you're all tied up, my dear? :)

La Roo said...

Wifey already has the dock girl job. Wouldn't want to step on any toes. She is used to all the perks.
Maybe if another position comes along I could apply.

I'm not tied up at the moment, but would like to be. :)