Saturday, November 22, 2008

Where Are You Going With This?

Sitting here this evening going from blog to blog, is really making me think. Where am I going with this blog of mine? I really have no rhyme nor reason. I am drawn to my little blogging world a couple times a day. As if I'm checking in on people, looking in on their world sometimes with envy or just sheer curiosity. Starting this blog several months ago I just wanted to do something or just have some type of purpose. I needed to vent, I needed to look, I needed to cry, I needed to search, I needed to be naked, I needed to feel...........I needed to be needed.
Doing this ISM shoot has given me something to do and I really am proud of it. Not in the way you could say "hey mom come see what I've been doing". But in the way of self expression and discovery and a realization of my sexuality and just taking it as it comes. Getting set up for this shoot was quite a challenge. I tried to make the pussy look cute and boobs look supple, while trying to hide flaws but also enhance my world of being in a chair. By doing this and letting myself be just me, my painting is becoming easier and at more of a flow. It's not such a fight as it was. I've received some great input from many people on this blog and I do give a lot of thought to what has been put out there for me. 
Also, starting this blog I really just wanted to prove that someone like myself in a wheelchair could turn someone on or just evoke an interest, instead of be pitied or looked at as some kind of freak. Being a woman.... not a disabled woman. For some reason that was important to me, because I think a lot of people can't get past the thing attached to my ass. And I know many would say that wasn't true, that it's just me being self conscious. Well, they haven't been in my everyday world with the looks and stares and talking down to. It's a whole "walk in my shoes" thing.
So I'm going to continue on my little blogging journey. I'll probably continue sharing my body a bit( quite a bit on ISM) ;) and just writing what I need to write and have fun doing it. Please stay with me and who knows what will be next, it's an adventure.


Anonymous said...

la roo I'm pretty sure that I speak for most here by saying that we feel honored to share part of your journey with you through your blog. I'm definitely sticking around these parts! It's kind of like having another little support community here behind our computers, one which functions completely differently to all the other communities we belong to. I enjoy parallel realities, and this one feels especially positive and right at the moment. There are some really special women and men around these parts (yourself being an important one) who are supporting each other in our sexual self-expression and journey in a really beautiful way, when I step back and see this happening I find it so amazing and refreshing... almost revolutionary! I'm so happy that you enjoyed your ism experience and I look forward to seeing the beautiful photos you have taken on ism tomorrow. Which is Monday for us here down under but Sunday for you I think. You are my hero x

Bob said...

Laroo: After doing this blog deal since 2006 and visiting a lot of blogs I have concluded that most blogs really have no direction: They go where ever their authors go. It's a "free form" method of what I feel is artistic expression whether written and/or photographic.

I've never met or been with a woman who didn't like at least one part of her body. No exception. And there's been more than a few women in my life so I speak with some authority on the subject albeit non scientific. :) Ha.

I see that you are typical in that regard but you also stack in your disability with that "laundry" you carry around with you.

Bob is always good for advise - - one of my many flaws. You are only as disabled as you allow yourself to be. I don't view you as being incapable due to a disability but as being very capable, adventuresome, spirited, intelligent and yes, beautiful . . . you've got a body most women would die for and I mean that. Okay, most guys would also die to have a body like yours on their wife or significant other.

So, you're okay, kid. Hang in there. Life is a bitch, a mother fucker for most of us. We all have disabilities of sorts when you think about it. It's how we overcome them. Those who need anger management - - - now there's a real disability. Sexual predators - - - a horrible disability. And men (most likely demonstrating those behaviors) wind up in the slammer.

Addiction. Neurosis. Psychosis. All disabilities of sorts that don't involve being bound to a chair but nonetheless handicapping to their holders.

Hopefully you can maintain who you are forever. That bright outlook on life you have is wonderful - and your willingess to think outside the box an outstanding trait.

Have I ranted enough? Have I conveyed my message? Take care and be happy. Keep blogging without a purpose. :)

Jake said...

I'm really glad you've found it rewarding because I like reading your blog.

La Roo said...

You guys made me cry. All of you. Damn it.
Thank you for being there.

Anonymous said...

yours is one of the best and most sexy blogs I read I love it

momentextase said...

La Roo wrote:

"And I know many would say that wasn't true, that it's just me being self conscious. Well, they haven't been in my everyday world with the looks and stares and talking down to. It's a whole "walk in my shoes" thing."

Well said La Roo.

Those "looks and stares" happen. It's frustrating, joy destroying and just plain disorienting and painful. It hurts. Of course it makes one self-concious, because one is being singled out, and being -"othered"-objectified-made alien. It hurts.

The only silver lining in that very real cloud is that it sorts out those that cross your path that have empathy and wisdom... and those that don't... yet anyway, there is always hope for them, people move at their own pace.

From stuttering, Tourette's, paraplegic, burn victims, schizophrenics, polio, birth defects, -the list goes on and on.
Even race, ethnicity -

All nothing people have any real control over, just the cards they were dealt. Singled out, judged, or made jokes of.... it happens.

We have little control over other peoples unthinking and uncompasssionate insecurities and fears... except (when we can) by example to pluck that golden etherial golden thread that connects everyone and everything.

But sometimes, for some reason that I speculate that has to do with mysteries of the energies that connect us all - a light seems to go on in a person's body, mind and soul.

As you can see, that light went on in chica, jake, bob, ausallblack, Britni, sequoiaredd, 13messages ... and everyone that has found this blog. And of course in turned on in you too La Roo.. your blog is proof of that.

So no matter where your blog goes, or what you do with it, we will understand and be inspired. I wonder how many golden threads and notes you pluck La Roo. The effects may not be immediate you know... but each vibation eventually makes the world a better place. You are very powerful La Roo... and becoming more so moment by moment.

momentextase said...

Youare so expressive, what you posted in this thread rings me like a tuning fork, especially about parallel realities and community.

Revolutionary -Yes, yes, yes!

momentextase said...

Bob wrote:
"Bob is always good for advise - - one of my many flaws"

Well bob, I always take your advise more as perspective... and not at all flawed... illuminating!

Yeah, not only women, but all of us -have things about ourselves we have problems accepting. At one time, I was at war with my whole body if you can imagine that... until I just gave up with that.

A "if you can't beat ...join it" sort of thing. OR-I am what I am and thats all that I am~ as Popeye would put it! LOL!

John said...

If you are like me and having read this I see similarities :) then blog is about getting thoughts down as you want them. I use my blog as my diary as well as a place to put things to share, keep the good work up with everything, you are a talented gifted woman and be proud of that